A Doll’s House: Parental Obligation vs. Personal Obligation

The play A Doll’s House by Henrik Ibsen was very impacting to me and I was very interested in the comments made during our class discussion that day. The topic of parental obligations had been brought up because of Nora leaving Torvald and their children behind at the end of the play to go off and do what she thought was best for her. I think that it is important to have both parents in a child’s life and when either of the parents leave it will affect the child permanently. The situation Nora is in is complicated because she is in an unhealthy relationship and feels that she is not able to raise her children properly until she understands herself first. Torvald accuses her of being a hypocrite, a liar, and a criminal and of having no religion, morality, or sense of duty. He also declares that she is unfit to bring up her children and that she might remain in his household but will no longer be a part of raising their children. This is very disrespectful for a mother to hear and if I was in the same situation I would feel the best option would be to leave as well. Parents do have an obligation to their children but they must first consider themselves. This is what Nora comes to realize in the end and shows her emotions in this interaction with Torvald.

…

Nora: I have other duties just as sacred. Duties to myself.

Torvald: Before all else you are a wife and mother.

Nora: I don’t believe that any longer, I believe that before all else I am a reasonable human being just as you are — or, at all events, that I must try and become one. I know quite well, Torvald, that most people would think you right and that views of that kind are to be found in books; but I can no longer content myself with what most people say or with what is found in books. I must think over things for myself and get to understand them.

…

What I gained from reading this play was an understanding that everyone needs to put themselves first before everything else because that is sometimes the best choice for those you love as well. A women does not need a man to make decisions for her and Nora is a symbol of this for others who feel trapped and are weighed down in their household by believing that they do need to satisfy their man and society.